Feathers of the Past
by FloppyWandedDementorBuggerer
Summary: What if Hedwig had actually been Lily Potter? What if Severus was the one to figure it out? Will Harry ever open up to her? SS/LP, HP/HG 5th year. Prologue? Screw the prologue! *Thanks to Erika for the title :3 I don't own Harry Potter. The whole plot- how Lily being back effects Harry/War/Voldemort/Snape- Everything.
1. Unrequited Love Meets Reacquainted Love

Title: Feathers of the Past

Author: FloppyWandedDementorBuggerer 

Rating: T

Pairings: Lily/Severus, Harry/Hermione… Ron/Draco? Hm…

Genre: Family/Drama

Warnings: Er… Idk.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter!

Summary: What if Hedwig had actually been Lily Potter? What if Severus was the one to figure it out? Will Harry be thankful or sorry it ever happened? SS/LP, HP/HG, RW/DM? 5th year. Prologue? Screw the prologue!

**Chapter One**: Unrequited love meet reacquainted love.

Harry Potter was sitting at his bed in Hogwarts reading the next chapter in his potions book by wand light. He had a blanket around him to keep warm this cold December night, which gave him the funny look of being a red Dementor. He looked up from his book when he heard the faint sound of tapping from the window.

"Hedwig?"

He got up and set his wand in his book as a bookmarker before opening the window with a bit of an effort.

"Girl? What's up?" He asked. She had no letter yet she came. Though, she did like to come in from the owlery every once in a while just to visit, which Harry didn't mind.

Hedwig hooted and nudged Harry's face lovingly, looking at him with her unmoving ember eyes. She looked almost angelic in the semi-dark dormitory. Harry let her fly and perch on the unused lamp by his bed while he opened his bottom drawer to take out a photo-album he had since his first year at Hogwarts. A photo-album with his parents pictures all in it, and a few with him, as well.

He opened it and saw a picture of his parents laughing and spinning around, very much in love and happy and another from their wedding and some snowy holidays. Then, he came to one of just his mother and him, it made his heart lurch to see those eyes and how they truly did resemble his own.

"I miss you, mum." Harry whispered, touching the photograph in a hope she could feel him, or perhaps, he could feel her.

Not a single day had passed since he missed her or his father. He didn't quite remember them, but just the thought of having them taken away like they were was so sad. He could've had a normal life. He should be anticipating leaving to Godric's Hollow to be welcomed home by his mother and possibly, a little sibling or two. But no, that would never happen. He'd lost his chance of a true family the day he received his scar.

Harry wiped away a tear and went to put the book away when he saw Hedwig looking at him with an almost _human_ expression. Odd. She looked _sad_ and just _pitiful_.

"Girl, you all right?" Harry asked, his voice a little tight from emotions, "It's fine, Hedwig. You can stay the night."

Hedwig flew to the lamp and put her head under her wing. A sign she was ready for sleep. Harry decided Hedwig had the right idea and went to bed, too. Since he was the only one in the dormitory, he fell asleep quickly.

(^-_-)^ PAGE BREAK! ^(-_-^)

The next morning Hedwig hooted lovingly to Harry and it made him smile to see the bright white owl fluttering her wings above his head.

"'morning." He yawned, "You'd best get to the owlery, Hedwig. I think some time with your friends would be good."

Hedwig just stared at him with her large eyes and hooted softly and flew near the window, waiting for Harry to open the window.

"There you go…" Harry said as he watched the white figure blend into the snow.

Harry loved Hedwig dearly. She was his second friend and his first birthday present. She was very special.

"Ron. _Ron_. _Ron_! Get up! We have potions this morning." Harry said reluctantly as he went and tried to pull Ron out of his bed.

"Five more minutes!"

Harry sighed but yanked the blanket off his groggy friend, "UP!"

After a few half-hearted curse words and a shower, they were headed down for breakfast.

"About time." Hermione said without looking up from her newspaper. She was already almost finished with her breakfast, "I was just reading… There's nothing in here Voldemort related."

"Well, that's good, right? Last thing we need is him to-"

"Yes, but we know things are happening, Harry! You know he's back! If he's not attacking, he's plotting!"

"Well, he's quiet now, so I'm just going to enjoy some breakfast." Harry said. He truly wasn't in the mood for any of this shit today.

"Oh, my- Harry… What's happened to Hedwig?!"

Harry looked up to where Hermione was pointing and saw Hedwig flying sporadically from the opening near the ceiling. He could clearly see red against her white feathers from where he sat. Everyone around them was now watching with disdain as she fluttered down.

"_Facock_." Harry sighed when Hedwig landed where his plate had been. Her left wing was very maimed and she had crimson dripping down her white feathers.

"Potter-" Professor Snape walked up to the commotion expecting to take away points, but when he saw the injured owl- "Come with me."

Harry scooped up his owl and followed Professor Snape through the Great Hall doors and towards the dungeons. Harry had a slight uneasy feeling that Snape was going to hurt her further, but he looked concerned.

"Set the owl there." He commanded once they were in his private quarters, "You may be wondering why I have bestowed myself to care for your owl?"

Harry nodded.

"Madam Pomfrey is on leave to study the healing techniques of the Bulgarians, in the meantime, it is up to me to care for sick or injured students. Or _pets_." He added as he cleared the blood away. He first removed the feathers with a quick '_serenus'_ and proceeded to clean the wound with another spell, "I'm going to give it a potion so that it won't get an infection." Professor Snape said.

"Her. It's a girl."

"Like it matters. Now, I think you have a class to get to?" Professor Snape asked, "And don't worry. I'll take care of the _bird_."

"Yes, sir." Harry said in a way that was not at all respectful.

Professor Snape continued in his persuit of the potion he needed. When he finally found it, he uncorked it and fed it to the owl by prying open its beak.

"Filthy- there we go. Now just- stay."

Professor Snape took the empty vile back to his cupboard, to the 'empty' side and when he turned around-

"_Lily_?"

Severus Snape saw before him Lily Potter naked and on the floor. But- Hedwig had just been- and Lily's arm was cut- was Lily- owl- Lily was the owl?! Severus couldn't think straight! She was just as beautiful as he could remember- and she was naked- so that didn't help the old feelings to bubble up like a roaring potion in the pit of his stomach. She was definitely a natural red-head, though.

But how did this happen? How did Lily Potter get turned into an owl in the first place? How did the potion he gave her reverse it? Why is she unconscious?

"Lily?" He asked again as he approached her calmly, "Lily, are you all right?"

He knelt before her and caressed her face with his hand. Oh, how he'd missed her all these years, and to think he'd given up all hope of ever seeing her again. He checked her pulse and felt her heart beating, slowly and steadily and saw her chest rise and fall, albeit a little longer than required.

Here she was. Lily Potter. Very much alive and- did I mention naked?

With a sigh, Severus got up and fetched a robe from his closet to cover her with. He slid it on her with great care and carried her to his bed. Laying down, her hair fanned out around her, the only color around her pale face.

"Lily…" Severus couldn't take his eyes off her. She was so lovely and alive and beautiful and alive- but how will he tell people? Should he? Fuck he didn't want anyone else to know, but he wanted at least one conversation with her alone. He wanted to be the first person she saw.

"_Enervate_." He said quietly, his wand pointed to her chest.

She drew in a quick breath and only exhaled it at once as a gasp.

"Severus? What's happened?" She asked, "Where am I?"

"You- you don't know?" He asked.

"All I remember is- Harry! Oh, is Harry alright?" She asked, "That man- Voldemort- he came! He was there! Where is he?"

"He's fine." Severus said, "You are at Hogwarts… You- you were apparently trapped as his pet owl for the last ten years."

"W-what?" She asked.

Lily sat up and realized how old Severus looked and the how she herself had aged as well. She saw the slightest tinge of grey about his hair.

"I'm sorry, Lily… We all thought- I mean we _buried your body_. I'm not sure how you're alive at all."

"My body? But- what about James? Where is he?"

"He's dead. The Dark Lord killed him." Severus said quietly.

"Oh- I think I remember now… But- what's happened to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?"

"He's still alive." Severus said quietly, "Listen- you must know, Lily. I-… I love you. I'm sorry this happened and since I have lived a life without you, I wish to never do so again. You must let me protect you."

"Sev…" Lily wasn't sure what to say. She had just awoken from a hibernation of sort, her mind was still reeling about the loss of her husband, but she was strong. And she still had Harry.

"Just stay here for now. I'm not sure what will happen if you are spotted, especially since everyone thinks you're dead."

"I want to see Harry. Please? How old is he now? What year is it?"

"1995." He said, "He's 15."

"_God_." She sighed putting her head in her hands, "I can't believe this. I can't believe this at all."

"I will bring him to you later. Would you like me to give him a run-through before I bring him to you?"

"Yes, please."

"Stay here," Severus said again, "I have a class to get to. I will see you at noon."

Severus turned to leave but stopped when Lily's voice came out softly.

"Thank you, Sev."

"Your welcome."

(^-_-)^ PAGE BREAK! ^(-_-^)

Severus' head was spinning like mad when he got to his potions class right on time with the bell, which he didn't expect. He was so out of it that he just sat at his desk and stared at the desk before him.

'Lily is alive. She's alive. I can't believe this. I wonder- I wonder if we'll ever be able to rekindle our old friendship. Or make it more, like I have wished for so long.'

"Is he okay?"

Professor Snape looked up and saw his whole class looking at him with anticipation. His gaze scanned over the student and he caught sight of Lily's eyes on the mirror image of James Potter.

Professor Snape stood up and with a flick of his wand he made directions to a random potion appear on the board.

"Pair up. Brew the potion. Do not disappoint me. Or injure yourself or any equipment." He added in an afterthought.

The topmost drawer to Professor Snape's desk creaked open along with the sound of students getting up to sit by their partner or to get the ingredients for the potion. Once opened, it revealed a secret compartment that could only be opened by the spell that he alone knew of. From its depths he pulled a small photo alum, one he had created when he was still in Hogwarts and best friends with Lily Evans, a surname he could live with.

He was positive that it was the true Lily Evans that was lying in his bed at that very moment, but who had they buried and who made her turn into an owl in the first place? Other than that, how did Potter serendipitously get that owl? The chances were so amazing it had to be planned. But who did it?

AN: What to expect in the next chapter? Harry meets his mother, but will he believe it's truly her? He wants to believe it, but trust Snape? Slightly.

~(**short**)SNEAK PEAK INTO **CHAPTER TWO**~

Harry held the old, yellowed map in his hands, but he couldn't believe it. His mother? Here? At Hogwarts? But- no. It had to be a mistake… but the map never lies.


	2. The Map Never Lies

**Chapter 2**: The Map Never Lies

Harry thought it very odd how Professor Snape was acting in class that day and mildly wondered if it had anything to do with Hedwig. Is she all right? What had Professor Snape done to her?

"Hermione… How long does it take animals, more specifically owls, to heal?"

"Oh, I'm not sure… It depends on what injury has befallen them. With Hedwig, it just looked like some sort of animal bit her, a wolf perhaps, but I don't think it would take too long. Maybe a couple hours. A day at the most."

"Oh. I'm worried about her. Doesn't Snape seem a bit off? And right after he is alone with Hedwig. Something isn't right."

"Harry, calm down." Ron said as he picked up a jar he knocked over, "He's probably going through one of those mid-life crisis things."

"Ron. I'm worried as well. Perhaps, he is just in a mood. I don't know. We'll find out later." Hermione said.

Harry sighed and turned to Neville, his partner since no one else would claim him, "No- you- augh, Neville! You don't do that with the eyes of newts!"

"I'm sorry, Harry! I- I misread and- and-"

Harry cut him off by a move of his hand and began to fix the problems Neville caused with a clouded mind.

(^-_-)^ PAGE BREAK! ^(-_-^)

Harry was very very _very_ worried to the point of paranoia when he got to lunch in the Great Hall that day.

"Snape isn't at his seat, Hedwig isn't here and- I'm going to go and see if I can find him."

Harry jumped up from his seat and left through the doors already reaching into his pockets for the map before his friends had any say-so. He looked down both sides of the hallway and went immediately to the first abandoned classroom he could find.

"_I solemnly swear that I am up to no good_." He said quietly.

The Hogwarts diagram and inhabitants showed up in a wave of ink and he held it closer searching for Snape's quarters. He found him straight away since everyone else was to lunch, but someone else was with him.

'Lily Potter' stood feet away from Snape in his private rooms. Harry held the old, yellowed map in his hands, but he couldn't believe it. His mother? Here? At Hogwarts? But- no. It had to be a mistake… but the map never lies.

Harry ran from the room and straight to the dungeons, just missing Snape as they both went down different parts of a forked hallway. He went to the door and knocked, then after a second of thought, opened the door without further hesitation.

Harry's stealth mode immediately turned on as he scanned the map. He smirked as he saw the 'Severus Snape' dot go in the opposite direction and the 'Lily Potter' dot still in his living quarters, more specifically, his bedroom. Harry opened a door and peered inside before he walked all the way in and stopped, for there, was his mother.

She was turned around looking down at something on a desk beside the bed, but Harry didn't care. He saw how red her hair was and that she was wearing robes much too big for her. But was this really her?

"Who are you?" Harry asked.

Lily Potter turned around and faced her son. A large smile broke across her face and she moved forward to hug him, but he cut him off.

"_Who are you_?" Harry demanded.

"Your mother." She said, "Has Severus not yet informed yo-"

"Did he make you? Did he recreate you so that he could mock me? Just to lay my feelings and emotions out in the open like this? _Who are you really_?"

Lily looked at him with hungry eyes trying to see how he'd changed since she'd last seen him so long ago. She wouldn't have recognized him if he didn't resemble James so much.

"I'm Lily Potter… I'm your mother. I used to be, well, this may sound crazy, but I was turned into an owl. You called her Hedwig."

"_You_… were my owl?" Harry was not buying this.

"Yes. And when I was hurt, Severus gave me a potion that somehow mad me turn back into my true self. He'll be able to explain it better."

"I'm sure he _will_." Harry said with great sarcasm.

Lily stood back from her son, tears beginning to form in her eyes. Oh, how she wanted to run up and hug him, but she wanted the hug to be returned and she knew he was indifferent now. She looked away and sat at her desk while Harry watched her with curiosity and, perhaps, anticipation.

Suddenly the door opened and a flustered Professor Snape ran through.

"Potter- I had just left to fetch you to tell you-"

"Tell me what? You used hair you saved from my mother and made some sort of sick Polyjuice potion? Why did you do this? Who is this and where is Hedwig?!" Harry roared.

"Potter, listen and reason. Someone turned your mother into that owl and replaced the old body with another. Now, the potion's effects have worn off and she is back. She knows nothing except what's happened before October 31, 1981."

"No way that's possible. You're _lying_." Harry said.

"So arrogant! Why would I joke about this? I loved your mother, Potter! We were friends here in Hogwarts!"

"Only the bigger of a reason for you to copy her! What did you use? Necromancy? You're _sick_!"

Harry refused to look directly at his mother, because if it weren't true, it would hurt when she did have to leave. He wouldn't be able to live with that memory.

"How dare you say such things, Potter? I am telling you this is Lily Potter."

"Harry… Honey, it's me. You must believe me. Please?" Lily asked walking towards him, her arms stretched out to touch him.

"No!" Harry said slapping her hand away fiercely, "I don't believe it. I know she's dead. I've known she's been dead since I even had memory. Her scream- it's all I hear in my nightmares. You are Lily Potter, but you are not _the_ Lily Potter. You are an evil clone, a replica! You are _not_ my mother."

And with that, Harry left Lily and Severus alone. Severus was red with anger while Lily already had tears streaming down her face.

"Just like his fa-" But Severus cut himself short and turned to see Lily now bawling into her hands, "Lily- I'm sorry. We just need to show him that it really is you."

"How, Severus? The poor boy! Why isn't he open-minded to this? Why won't he trust us?"

Severus sat himself on a small sofa and gestured for Lily to sit next to him.

"Mr. Potter has just been lied for the first ten years of his life, then by a few other people… He probably has trust issues."

"For the first ten years… Who lied to him for so long?"

"Petunia."

"Oh… So that's who was chosen to watch him?" Lily asked, "No wonder! She probably hid the fact he was a wizard-" Severus nodded, "That- that _woman_! She never did like James! Or you for that matter."

"She's just close-minded."

"And a right pain in the arse!"

Lily began to laugh and Severus found himself laughing along with her. He hadn't laughed like this since- well… Since the last time he was with Lily.

"You must be hungry." Severus said after a moment of thought, "I could firecall the kitchens and have them bring us up a late lunch. I haven't another class for a while, so we could dine together."

"That would be nice, Sev." Lily said with a smile.

She sat back in her seat and laid her head back just thinking while Severus went to his fireplace in the next room. She couldn't believe her husband was gone. She also couldn't believe her only son wasn't talking to her. Hell, he didn't even believe she existed! She looked down at the coffee table before her and helped herself to the brandy knowing Severus wouldn't mind at all.

"Here," Severus said as he came back through the door, two plates lazily levitating before him, "I know you like your treacle tart."

"Oh, thank you, Sev."

"Are you coping well? You've always been able to mask your emotions well, Lily." Severus said as he sat down next to her.

"I'm fine. Well, I mean- Part of me hoped Harry would understand, but I still understand how he would be…"

"Arrogant?"

"Yes. Arrogant." Lily said, "I've missed so much. Now, I only have you."

Severus chose not to reply, but Lily knew he was just as good at hiding emotions when he wanted to.

"So," Lily said with a sip of her brandy, "Fill me in on what's happened since I've been… gone."

"Oh, this is a story," Severus said, "Well, after you, erm, yes well all the Death Eaters fled. We-…"

"Severus. It's fine. I understand that you got into the wrong crowd, but I will always be your friend."

Severus internally flinched at the word 'friend' but went on, "We all said we had no part of it, that we were all under the imperius curse. After that night- I was never truly loyal to the Dark Lord again. The moment I realized you were who he was going to attack, I went to Dumbledore, but even he couldn't save you." Severus paused and took a drink of brandy again, "I then became a spy for both sides and I would tell the Order everything the Dark Lord is planning, then I would feed the Dark Lord lies and even truths, depending on what the Order wanted me to do. I couldn't just give him lies all the time.

"After that night, we all thought the Dark Lord was gone for sure, but he came back in spirit in the back of a DADA teacher's head. Harry was actually the one to stop him. I believe the _notion_ of you sacrificing yourself for his wellbeing was enough to cast protection over him, Lily, for the Dark Lord, even in spirit, wasn't able to touch him even with a new body, without burning to death.

"The next year, Mr. Potter's second year of Hogwarts, the Chamber of Secrets was opened by Miss Weasley, Molly Weasley's daughter. Of course, she was under a spell brought on by a diary left behind from the Dark Lord, we are still unsure how exactly it worked though. But it was opened and Mr. Potter saved Miss Weasley by taking the sword of Gryffindor from the Sorting Hat and piercing it through the mouth of a Basilisk and then the diary.

"Now, what happened next was the ordeal with Sirius Black. You may remember him for turning you over to the Dark Lord? Well, he was sent to Azkeban, but he escaped and proved that he wasn't guilty at all. Potter even saved him from a Dementor's Kiss. It was terrible, dementors were everywhere and him and miss Granger used a school's Time-Turner to go back and save Sirius, and Harry did this by casting a Patronus.

"Then, we hosted the Tri-Wizard Tournament and he was chosen, even though he was fourteen, and this happened last year. He ended up winning, but witnessed something terrible. The rebirth of the Dark Lord. He was able to escape, but only just, and even brought back a dead Cedric Diggory. And just this summer he had a hearing with the Ministry of Magic for saving his cousin from a Dementor. Oh, and the whole castle hates him because they think he killed Cedric Diggory at the Tri-Wizard Tournament. And no body believes the Dark Lord to be back except Mr. Potter, Dumbledore, myself and some of the Order of the Pheonix."

"Wait- all of this happened to my son? Harry Potter?"

"Yes."

"Oh, my- no wonder he hates me! I allowed this all to happen!"

"No- you had no say-so in any of this! You were an owl!" Severus reasoned, but Lily wouldn't hear it.

"My baby! He- he fought He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named! He- everyone hates him? He's done more in his 15 years of existence than most Aurors! Dear _Merlin_!"

"Shh- please, it's fine, Lily! All of this probably would have happened in the first place!" Severus said as he placed an arm around her.

"But- the poor _dear_! You just don't understand! I need him to know who I am! I need him to understand how much I wish for him to be _happy_!" Lily looked up, her green eyes contrasting greatly with the redness around them.

"Lily…" Severus was never one for comforting, he wasn't sure what to say, "I will talk to him. I will try to get him to understand."

"Thank you, Sev." Lily choked, "But what can I do? When can I come out in public?"

"I don't know, Lily. I'm still- I'm still unsure how to go about you being alive at all. I mean… what are the odds?"

"And I'm not? I've missed, what, _fourteen_ _years_? I don't know who would do this in the first place! Who would?"

"I have no clue." Severus said quietly. That question had been haunting him the last few hours. Wow- it had only been a few hours since Lily had been discovered and so much had happened.

"_God_- I can't believe this…" Lily cried, "And he- he has to defeat this monster? I heard of the prophecy just before that night."

"I'm not entirely sure, but it seems he has a great part in it. Dumbledore himself isn't sure how exactly Harry fits into this entirely, but he's been trying. With you here now- I'm not sure what's going to happen."

"I've just ruined everything, haven't I? Harry hates you more than he did and now- the poor dear thinks everyone is against him. He thinks I'm some sort of crazy experiment and that you are playing a joke on him! I mean, how are we going to let him see? Let him know I am his mother and that I want nothing but the best for him? I want him to know what true love is like and I want him to know how much I loved- love him… If he lets me."

"I promise to try and work at him, Lily. Later, I think we should go to Dumbledore and discuss things with him."

"I think that would be best."

(^-_-)^ PAGE BREAK! ^(-_-^)

"Harry! … Harry?" Hermione said as she watched Harry walk right past her in the common room and to the dorms.

"What's his problem?" Ron asked, watching as his friend went to the boy's dormitory in a silent rage, "He seems angry for some reason."

"Go talk to him! Maybe- oh, no! What if Hedwig got sick and Snape couldn't help her?" Hermione asked him.

"I don't know- I'll go! Just- hush!" Ron said hiking his bag up his shoulder and climbing the stairs to the dormitory. When he got to the 5th year boy's dormitory he saw Harry sitting on his bed with his map on his lap. Just staring at it, though his face held a strange emotion that Ron seldom saw, depression- sadness- angst.

"Harry?" Ron asked quietly, "What's the matter?"

Harry slowly looked up at Ron and then back to his map before heaving a great sigh. He took the map and set it in Ron's hands.

"What am I looking fo-… Wait- Lily P-Potter… What-"

"I know. It's one of Snape's tricks. He somehow turned Hedwig into a replica of…"

Ron looked back down at the map and watched as 'Lily Potter' paced Snape's living quarters while he sat on the couch. Is this really what happened?

"You sure? I mean- how could he even do that?"

"Polyjuice. He's sick, Ron. _Sick_. I want out of this school. _Now_." Harry said, "Everyone expects so much from me! I had to watch a student die, face Voldemort twice and now- now he's rubbing a doppelganger of my mother in my face! I don't even know what he did with Hedwig!"

"Harry, mate- what if this really is-"

"It's not, Ron! She's dead. D-E-A-D! She's _never_ coming back!" Harry yelled as tears began forming in his eyes, "I know it. I hear her screams before- before he killed her. I know she's gone. Dead. Buried."

"-what's going on? I heard you-" Hermione ran up the stairs and stopped short seeing Harry in such a vulnerable state, "What's happened?"

Ron handed Hermione the map while Harry said, "It's a sick joke of Snape's and I'm not buying it! I'm not buying any of this shit anymore!"

"_Harry_!" Hermione said in shock when her eyes found what he was talking about, "You know the map never-"

"Lies? Oh, I know! But it can be tricked! I don't know how, but he must've poisoned Hedwig into appearing as my m-mother."

"Have you spoken to him, Harry?" Hermione asked quietly.

"I spoke to both of them. She claims to be my mother, but- she isn't. She can't be. He's put a curse on Hedwig and he's spilled the lies for her to feed me."

"Harry- look- she's pacing! She's probably worried, sad, that her son won't understan-"

"She's not my _mother_ and I am not her _son_! Don't you understand? This is Snape! He's taken Hedwig, poisoned her and now- now he says she's been my mother this whole time."

"You've believed crazier things, Harry. Why is this so hard to believe?" Hermione asked.

Harry's face hardened as he looked from Ron to Hermione.

"I'm going to see the Headmaster." He said as he pushed past them.

**AN**: Special thanks to **hervissa** for the review! I seriously lol'd at it! But- to reply- Harry must be in this in some places :P And what did you mean by 'Sev and Lily again… together?' More specifically 'again'…

This is short, but the next ones will be full of angst and all that. I mean, really, so many problems to fix and things to address! Will Harry say why he feels so hurt? Will he open up in the next chapter? Well, I have no clue because I haven't written it yet, but I'm starting right now!

Harry/Hermione make way soon, but Ron/Draco… Yeah, I may just cut that. Too much in the plot, eh?


	3. Love Wouldn't Exist Without Hate

**Chapter 3**: Love Wouldn't Exist Without Hate

Lily held her glass of brandy with a much firmer grip than she need as she and Severus sat in silence. Severus took notice of this and many more things of her, like her beauty and her sadness and how they seemed to amplify each other. Looking at her now as her head was turned he saw the whole outline of her face, though it was cut short by her draping red hair over her eyes. Her posture was slack, as she had no strength to truly sit high in the sofa.

"Severus." She said suddenly, "Do you have anymore classes today?"

He watched as her lips formed the words and it took him only a second longer than normal to reply, "No. Not today."

"Then, before we go to Dumbledore… I have a few things to tell you." She turned her head to him and faced him, her bright green eyes held his gaze, they always would, "I know that day that you called me that, you didn't mean it. You've changed since then. I've changed. I hope you can forgive me for ignoring you and, well… just being terrible."

"I could never hold a grudge against you, Lily." Severus said quietly though firmly, "It is I who should be begging for forgiveness."

"Shut up." Lily said with a smirk, "We forgive each other."

Lily took a quick sip of her glass and sighed before closing her eyes and running a hand through her semi-long hair.

"Severus," Lily said eventually, "If-… If Harry never listens to reason, will you stay with me?"

"Always."

"You're really such a good friend, Sev." Lily said with a smile that lasted only a second, only to be replaced by a look of contemplation. She looked over his face; he'd gained a few wrinkles since she'd last seen him but he was still that tall, dark, hard man she remembered. She'd always just love him. There was never a question as to if she loved him. He was the person who introduced her to magic; he showed her things no one else did. He had a special place in her heart that no one else could possibly fill.

"I just care." Severus said carefully, "I mean, I tolerate you and care about… you."

Lily leaned up and kissed him on the cheek, rendering Severus silent, shocked, excited-

"I love you." Lily said quietly.

"I love you, too."

"Mr. Potte-"

"Don't-" Harry seethed, "give me that. I am here to inform you of a cruel sick joke, Headmaster."

"Please do, then, Mr. Potter."

"My owl was hurt and Sna-"

"Professor Snape, Harr-"

"I DON'T GIVE A DAMN. LET ME TELL MY STORY!"

Professor Dumbledore was very shocked at how Harry looked so angry, mad, depressed, full of angst and just _broken_. He bowed his head and allowed Harry to continue.

"_As I was saying_… My owl flew into the Great Hall this morning fatally wounded. _He_ took her for care saying Madam Pomfrey was out and then demanded I leave. Later, he was acting strangely so I checked my map. You know whose name I saw next to his instead of Hedwig?"

Dumbledore lifted his head and gave Harry a questioning glance.

"Lily Potter." Harry said.

"Surely-"

"The map never lies, Headmaster! Never! So I went to his room and I saw her. My mother- he… He's cloned her or _something_! I don't know! But I am tired of this! All the time I am forced into things, I am _messed_ with, I am _taunted_, I am _lied_ to and now… Now I have been _humiliated_. _Mocked_. He goes or I do!"

Harry pointed to the door with great vigor to reinstate his eagerness to leave. He was shaking now, breathing great yet short breaths as he looked into the pale blue eyes of his headmaster.

"Mr. Potter, I will need to hear his side of the story. And as for your mother-"

"I know she's dead! He's cloned her or replicated her with a potion!"

"Mr. Potter. There is no way to know that unless we examine her, which I will do personally. In front of you." Professor Dumbledore said calmly, "Now. Wait here while I-"

"Headmaster?"

"Severus?" Professor Dumbledore turned around to see the head of Severus Snape sticking out of his fire place, "What is the matter?"

"I wish to speak with you, if I may."

"I was actually about to call on you myself. Please do."

"I have a guest." Severus said before his head left. It was only gone for a moment before the flames grew and out came Severus and soon behind, Lily Potter.

"Potter? So- have you-" Severus started.

"_Yes_! I've told him everything you've done you _sick_ _basta_-"

"_Harry_!" Lily scolded.

"_Enough_! Now. Severus is going to tell me what's happened, aided by Lily- and Harry," Dumbledore turned to him, "-you will stay quiet and listen."

Harry scowled but obliged, relaxing in his chair and looking expectantly at Severus and his mother. He listened as they retold the accounts of what happened, Lily gave a speech Harry suspected was supposed to make him feel guilty and actually make him beg for his mother to be in his life. But he wasn't going to fall for it. Snape is a Death Eater. They were trained to lie and scheme.

"Harry? What do you have to say?" Dumbledore asked.

"I have nothing to say. I stand by what I said."

"What if I brought some veritiserum into this?" Dumbledore asked, "I could give it to both of them."

Harry looked up. He hadn't thought of that. What if it really were his mother? He didn't know what he'd do if she really were here with him.

"Do it, then." Harry said.

Lily smiled and Severus' face lightened a bit as Dumbledore gave them both a small vile of veriterserum.

"Who are you?" Dumbledore asked Severus to show the potion had indeed worked.

"I am Severus Snape."

"Who are _you_?" Dumbledore asked turning his head to the redhead. Everyone tensed, even Snape. What if this really was a trick? What if she were just some kind of illusion and she would turn back into an owl the second she spoke.

"I am Lily Potter." She said.

Everyone relaxed in their chairs and all eyes turned to her- all except Harry's who's remained to the floor.

"Harry?" Lily asked quietly, "Do you understa-"

"I need to be alone." Harry said, looking up at his mother for only a second before running out of the room.

* * *

Harry thinking as he runs away from Dumbledore's office:

_'I can't believe it- it really is her! She's back, but- I can't- I can't believe this! I don't know what to believe! So- Snape is good? They are friends? She didn't seem intirely repulsed by his presence, so that has to mean something. But what if Dumbledore is in on it? What if he gave them separate potions?_

_No- I trust Dumbledore. So what does this mean? What does this mean that my mom is back?_

_Oh- Hermione! Yes- there she is- I need to talk to her!'_

"Hermione!"

(end Harry POV)

Harry ran up to where Hermione sat in the common room and just stood for a moment in silence before-

"_Harry_? Harry! What's happened?" She asked stowing away her books in haste.

"We really need to discuss this alone, Hermione…" Harry said quietly.

"Okay…"

Hermione got her things together and walked with Harry out of the common room and into the hallways of Hogwarts. He walked ahead and from this angle she had of his face, he was pretty full of angst and nervousness. What's gotten into Harry today? Has it really just been hours since Hedwig had been hurt and then- his mother was here.

Hermione watched as he turned, his green eyes full of emotion and now focused solely on her. He looked so broken, so sad, so…

"Please, in here." Harry said as he opened the door to the classroom.

Hermione walked in and immediately turned so she could face Harry, who was closing the door on the dimly-lit room.

"Harry… What's happened?" She asked.

"It's really my mom- she's really here. Alive." Harry said sadly.

"Shouldn't you be rejoicing? Be happy? She's _alive_, Harry! Why are you here and not with her?" Hermione asked coming forward to Harry and putting a hand on his shoulder.

"It should be, but- I've lived my whole life wishing for her to be back. I've spent my whole life just wishing I had a mother and dreaming of what she would be like! I always did. But recently… I've grown up. I realized I didn't and will never again have a mother. I filled the empty space she left with other people like Mrs. Weasley and, well… you. You always comfort me, you're always here for me and you're just so smart, Hermione. I love you so much- and, now that she's back… I'm not sure I have any… any room for her. It's not that I don't want to, it's just- mentally- this is going to be so hard."

"Oh, Harry…" Hermione got closer and pulled him into a hug, "You are the sweetest most caring person I know… This is going to be very hard, yes, but she is your mother and, well, it'll get easier. I promise."

"Thanks." Harry sighed as he broke the hug, "I just wonder what it'll be like. To have a mother."

"You'll learn as you go, Harry. You just… need to get to know each other and talk. I'm sure she's yearning to know what you've been up to." Hermione said, "But remember. I'll be here for you if you ever need to talk."

"I know, Hermione." Harry said with a smile, "Hence the conversation we just went through."

"And also," Hermione said quietly, "I love you, too."

Harry's eyes went wide. He'd forgotten he revealed that to her a few moments ago and was equally surprised when she felt the same way. He looked at her to see her large brown eyes on his. Next thing he knew, they were kissing, and he wasn't even sure who started it.

All he could think of was how soft Hermione's lips were against his own and how perfect she was.

* * *

"Severus… Why did he run away like that?"

Severus Snape sighed as he watched Lily walk back and forth in his office. She'd been doing this ever since Dumbledore dismissed them from his office half an hour ago. All they disucsed was that she should lay low and not leave his leaving quarters for a while, or just until the Order of the Pheonix and the Ministry of Magic knew of her, um, 'come back'.

"It's a lot for a boy to take in, Lily. He probably just needs to clear his mind." He was getting very agitated with her constant talking about the boy, he understood but, he really wanted to move onto other things, "How about you sit down, calm your mind and I'll fetch us a late dinner?"

"Sounds good, Sev." Lily said as she did an about face to face him, "Fire-whiskey?"

"Of course." Severus sighed. Honestly, he could use some himself. This had officially been the longest day of his life. He reflected on how well he was handling Lily being back as opposed to Potter… Why was that? Shouldn't he be a bit more surprised or confused? Perhaps- he will in time. He wanted to enjoy having her back to its full extent. He wanted to hold her and cherish like he should have all those years ago.

As he walked through the halls of the school down a path to the kitchens, he thought of the first time they met, how surreal it seemed that a girl like her would like a boy like him. And still, today, she was kind and compassionate. He wondered if the fact that Harry was here, if that would hinder his wooing of Lily. Of course it would! He would be a constant reminder of James! He would be a constant reminder of the life she chose. She chose Potter not Snape. She shoes the Gryffindor not the Slytherin. She chose brawn over brains.

She chose him… not me.

* * *

**AN**: I have no clue how Lily truly is, but from what the books say she's independent, caring, nice and just loves anyone who loves her. Right? Am I portraying her properly so far? More reviews would be nice, but thanks to **Erika** and **hervissa** for reviewing! Love you! :3

And LOL to myself for leaving Ron out of this completely… He's probably off eating something. Or sleeping. Yeah… He's that kind of Ron. Well… Maybe he will get with Malfoy… Or I could do a different story… Meh. Ron can be single in this and I shall stop mumbling.

XOXO, FloppyWandedDementorBuggerer (FWDB) 3

**REVIEWS ARE LOVE. **

Oh, and just to be clear, the whole plot is going to be Harry/Hermione establishment, Harry reacting to the Lily/Severus pairing and, well, how to fucking kill Voldemort! Damn! And, will Severus be loyal to the Dark Lord still? Hmm… I need to figure that out, too ;)

ALSO- to **azphxbrd** no, Lily cannot change back into Hedwig, she is Hedwig and Hedwig was she, temporally. Hedwig no longer exists.. blah. And the potion or _whatever_ she was put under turned her into an owl, like an 'animagus coma' of sorts. I hope that makes sense. She would've stayed that way forever had Severus not given her a healing potion, which had a counter-acting agent in it that reversed the original potion. She would only turn into an owl if she took that same exact potion, but that won't happen. Probably. Maybe.


End file.
